Catching Up

I hate being sick, and I've been sick for the past two days. Terrible cold, body aches, possible fever, annoying headache -- I think most people would call this The Flu. I don't have time for this.

Since I have fluid in my ears most of the time, along with chronic allergies and sinus problems, this is seriously no fun.

The older girls all left Monday morning to go to TN to their conference, in my van, so I've been managing with catch-as-catch-can in terms of needing a car to drive. Same thing last week, when the van was in the shop the better part of the week because of the (insert expletive of your choice here) check engine light.

Sometimes I get the Rav, sometimes not. Mostly not. Which, the past two days, has been fine. Today I am committed to going to the doctor and getting every and any antibiotic known toman in order to kill all germs in residence in my head. Honestly -- this sinus headache I've got has me thinking that chemotherapy isn't a bad idea.

VBS has been going all week, so Hunk O Man and Baby have been MIA every evening. That has enabled me to walk the dog, water the flowers, and run the sprinkler. I feel like an old woman, and yet I enjoy it immensely. Ah, the quieter pursuits of life.

Which were seriously interrupted on Wednesday evening --

. . . because Baby (mine) was keeping B's baby, Lydia, who is about 15 months old. And very busy.

Oops! There's no one to watch her at VBS! Enter me, the past-the-baby-stage-but-not-yet-to-the-grandma-stage yet babysitter.

What a busy little girl. Oh my goodness, how I've forgotten. Good Lord, how DID I do this with 5 under 5?

We snapped the "snaps." That's what you call fresh green beans around here -- "snaps." Actually I get that little colloquiallism, because it makes sense. You snap off the ends and then snap them in half to cook them. Lydia sat on the counter and chewed on 3 or 4 of them while I snapped. Raw green beans? Not my veggie of choice, but hey, she's only a year old. So whatever.

We went outside and watered flowers. She ate pinecones, put her hands in the hose and got soaked, and played with (chased) the dog. Now some things I haven't forgotten -- like how kids will eat pinecones, dirt, gravel, straw, grass, etc. But my kids have all survived, so I figured she would too.

And getting wet -- well, I recall the time I tried having a garden and ended up with a mud pit, and my kids all decided to have a go at mud-sliding and wrestling. I remember my mother was visiting, and I looked at her and sighed. She was laughing at me. I said, "Mom, I can always buy new clothes, I guess."

B would have been pulling Lydia out of the hose water telling her not to get wet. Psuedo-Grandma Jen, however, knows that the clothes will dry, and it's a hot summer evening, so why not? After all, there aren't 2 or 3 or 4 other kids to get ready for bed. . .

I changed her stinky diaper. I swear, even after 5 kids, I will never get used to the smell of poop. Ahkey-shewey!

Then I pulled off all her clothes and let her run thru the house jabbering away in her diaper. Ah-dah-dah-dah-dah in the most serious of tones. How hilarious is it when they look at you as if they've just asked you a question and they completely expect you to understand what they've said? I always try and take them seriously, because I think they trust you more if they think you speak it.

I tried putting one of Baby's shirts on her, but she just kept pulling at it. No problem then, we'll just take it off. Naked with just a diaper works for me.

Her little bare buns looked just like JB's when JB was a baby -- little dinner rolls. I used to say "We'll just put butter on them and eat'em up!"

Baby (mine) didn't bring me any dry clothes, pj's, or a bottle. So I made do with a small water bottle filled with milk. We sat and watched Jon & Kate + 8 and Lydie almost went to sleep. Her eyes were just little narrow slits, all comfy with her pacifier, watchin' tv in my lap.

In the end, I only had to pick up the plastic containers and lids strewn across the kitchen floor, plus a package of toe-separators for toenail-polishing that she somehow found. And a few green bean ends and some crushed goldfish crackers. Actually, it wasn't any different than when my teenagers are home.

Maybe I am almost ready to be a Grandma after all. Those little cheeks were awfully sweet, and definitely hard not to constantly smooch on . . .nonstop . . .